Letting go past & healing anxiety

07/02/2021 - 

My life was going alright. I have been suffering from anxiety a couple of months. I can’t breathe and feel suffocated sometimes.
Recently I’ve been getting flashbacks when I was a teenager at secondary school I was bullied at school due to being shy.
I didn’t have much confidence and didn’t have much friends at school. I went to a girl school called Hornsey School for Girls and some of the girls noticed I was shy and this is where they started to bully me. They didn’t want me to sit with them or talk to them, when I try to they use to get nasty towards me and even make fun of me.
During the time I was taking my GCSEs in 1999 I wasn’t doing well as I was slow at learning things quickly, a few of the teachers use to put me down a lot. My predicted grades weren’t good, however, I got C’s and D’s for my GCSE coursework. I was taking GCSE Geography classes and towards taking the exam my teacher told me that she won’t make me take the exam, so I had to drop this subject out. I really wanted to take the exam at the time, but I didn’t fight for it to go against the teacher. This made me feel very awful and that I wasn’t good enough during that time.
After I got my GCSE results I had failed them and I had to go on doing GNVQ at college. After I done GNVQ I had go on to University and passed my degree with flying colours.
However, I contacted a private college in London recently who accept adults for GCSEs. I’ve explained that I wanted to do GCSE Geography so they sent me a form and have to pay a fee. I’m not sure whether I should do this back as I’m undecided?

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Hope Church Lancaster

Psalm 119:114

'You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in Your word.'

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